Could Support Groups be the Solution for Positive Male Mental Health?

Stemming from a tragedy, Andy's Man Club creates a safe and vulnerable space for men to open up.

Due to today's stigma and stereotypes surrounding men, many feel unable to discuss their feelings. With the leading cause of death for males under 50 in the UK being suicide, urgency regarding men's mental health needs to be addressed. Andy's man club does just this. 

Starting back in 2016 following the suicide of Andrew Roberts, a young 23-year-old, the club's leading objective is suicide prevention. In the wake of his passing, many asked why they were so unaware of the personal issues plaguing him. Why didn't he talk about these and who else is suffering in silence?  

Whereas they are not a professional service, they do provide a safe space through their group meetings. A judgement free and anonymous point where men of all ages can come together as a collective and share how they feel. From I'm struggling with university to I'm struggling with retirement.

Ian Hounsome, the Edinburgh representative recalls the youngest member he has encountered being eighteen, and the oldest being 87.  “He (the 87-year-old man) lost his partner after 40 years of marriage, he's just lonely and wants to hang out with other guys and get a coffee. So, it really is everything. I'd say typically its 20 to 50-ish, but there are regional differences”  

Safeguarding prevents the group from being fully accessible to younger men under 18. While this is regrettably so, Hounsome coaches different organisations on how they can tackle the lack of communication in the daily life of friends and families.  

“As soon as you say mental health everybody assumes its negative. You can have good mental health, you can be in a great place, or you could be in a bad place, or anywhere in-between. So, I encourage everyone to talk more.”

The groups official sign

Further, he recommends the simple things, conversational cards and ice breaker websites therefore instigating a cool, friendly atmosphere.  “I get it there's a lot of fear, there's a lot of embarrassment about talking. It's seen as a sign of weakness. You know? Am I going to get laughed at? Especially amongst younger men”  

While younger men may feel it's difficult to speak up and gain the confidence to talk about their issues, let alone attend these groups. This daunting feeling does not go over the heads of Andy's Man Club. What they call a “sweeper” stands outside of their venues, dawned in black and white. They keep a keen eye out for men hovering the area looking for a sign, emotional or physical, and usher them in with warm and welcoming arms. 

“Irrespective of age, the one thing we hear time, after time, after time. Is taking the steps through the door. You don't know what's behind the door, there's that fear and we often here about guys who, you know, walk past or have tried to come for weeks or months! Before they actually, finally, get in”  

Credit-Ian Hounsome, Edi. Representative.

When individuals do finally feel comfortable entering into the groups, they are met with some pretty staple environments. Attendees can span from 5 to 30 people, once they hit that higher end they look to expand. If 30 people seems a little too much to handle there are several bases in which they operate. Making it as accessible as possible for the public, while also being able to appreciate each member. 

Upon arrival and the settling of the group they pass around a little stress ball and ask some tame questions such as How are you today? or ultimately Do you have anything you want to get off your chest?  

What is discussed in the group, stays in the group. Even if Hounsome were to see you in public, an eye wouldn't be blinked, to protect your privacy and your comfort.  

While they do in person meetings, for those unable to attend or paralysed with anxiety, they conduct several closed Facebook pages that are open to discussion whenever you may need them.   

In due time, Andy's Man Club want you to leave the meetings feeling many things, but fundamentally why they work is to produce hope.  

“Nobody's going to fix your problems, no one is going to give you the answer, but it's just about hope. For me, and what I hear a lot of other guys saying is that feeling of I'm not the only one with a problem? - Theres loads of guys, with loads of different problems and you go, do you know what? I'm not alone. That person understands the struggle I'm facing or going through. It's that little bit of hope people in the room understand, and i suppose there's that little bit of connection” 

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